Faith

 Faith

Just for a foundation of who’s speaking: I ministered for many years. I went to the streets of Harlem in an attempt to save the junkies from themselves, from their addictions, as I had come to believe I was saved—by a faith in something outside myself. I wanted this faith to answer all my questions, to put me in a place of peace and relaxation, with no more questions to be answered and nothing to worry about, because I knew my future and had realized my source.

With that said, I’m speaking to you as I once spoke to myself when I came to this realization: If your faith does not offer more questions than answers, then that faith has made you a cripple, a soldier for God, marching in lockstep to His or Its orders.

Today, my faith lies in the ability to be free to respond, “I don’t know.” To be free not to put my life in lockstep with the directions of a book canonized 2,000 years ago, at least 200 years after the death of its main character. I believe that the master of the universe, whoever or whatever it is, is not angry with me for this. Instead, it applauds me for using my intelligence, my curiosity, and my fearlessness to question these things. Jacob wrestled with God. Israel means “to wrestle with God.” I wrestle with everything. When the doctors told me I had only a short time to live, I wrestled with it—and I won. If I had more faith in the doctors than I did in my body’s ability to do what it did—return to health—I would be dead.

I say all of this to encourage you: walk outside the box you may have placed yourself in. If there are walls, climb over them. If a river blocks your way, ford that stream. You are more powerful than all of that. You have access to all knowledge. My lama often said, “Space is information.” The context was this: when we go into deep meditation, and the body falls away, and we fall into space, we are in a soup of information. When we return to our bodies, we are informed.

Be well, my friends. I love you dearly.